Range Rover Autobiography Black 40th Anniversary Limited Edition

Posted on 30. Jul, 2010 by johnbeale in Blog, featured

I have been concerned about the Range Rover for a while. It’s an amazing car, however you see less and less of these behemoths on the front page of Heat with Paris Hilton spread eagled, clamoring out of the back seat. Why? Well I guess a lot of celebrities have to push the new “green” agenda. So a big V8 Range Rover doesn’t exactly say… ‘ I care about the planet’ enough. This however, is not my real concern.

Say you are a Government official and you drive a traditional black Range Rover… and all of your other government cronies have purchased the Mercedes Benz ML 63 AMG, the BMW X6 or even the Range Rover Sport. Dare I say you are a little “outclassed”? Your vehicles nearest competitors have massive shiny rims, massive shiny grilles or massive chrome skirting. You feel a little too ‘stately’ in your traditional Range Rover. You feel, a bit too pedestrian, too much like a monarch or the Queen Mum…I could go on forever. So you’re looking for something that will set you apart when you arrive at the next low-cost housing groundbreaking ceremony. The there is the Nigerian drug lord, who also drives a black Range Rover, and feels that his underlings, and mules do not see him as respectfully as they ought to. Looking him IN the eye instead of down at the ground. He narrows it down to his ride, and he needs something that best embodies his dictatorship.

LandRover have had their ears to the ground and have launched the Range Rover 40^th Anniversary Autobiography Black Edition. Cue dancing woman with velvet curtain backdrops, stage-smoke and cars rising out of a showroom floor spinning slowly on a rotating base.

The Black edition features a Titan mesh grille similar to a home made mesh braai grill – akin to that which sits on the Chrysler 300C. Just, much, much, bigger. That’s an affirmative on the blinging the front of the car to stun onlookers, mobsters and monarchs alike!

Now for the all important 20” diamond-turned alloy rims, so that’s blinging rims – tick. To cater, and limit the time a prospective customer would have to spend mulling over which colour to choose, the rims come in ‘Barolo Black’ – a Ford esque touch to the Range Rover production line. This makes things very simple at the dealership.

Don’t let the monochromatic rims fool you. If you’re thinking that you still won’t stand out, chrome detail skirts the intake vents, there are colour coded door handles, and then of course, the obligatory chrome badge on the back stating the clear intention that this is none other than the “Autobiography” model.

The interior gets the same garish treatment, with “Autobiography” branded on every inch of leather, including the armrest. The steering wheel is finished with half wood, half grand black wood. Goodey. Of course, you can mix and match the interior to suit your kitsch taste or to accent your gold teeth. Whether it be snakeskin gear-knobs or hand-stitched Louis Vuitton headrests the choice is yours. Picture the Louis Vuitton emblem splashed across your headrests, Gucci floor mats and a gear-knob made from the skins of ten near extinct white lions.

So, Range Rover has solved the South African government official materialistic neurosis, and the Nigerian druglord’s problem…who would have thought, the Brits helping out in Africa like that! Not only will you have one of the most exclusive Range Rover’s ever built, but you’ll also stand head and shoulders above any of the other dull vehicles outside Parliament or upon the streets of Lagos.

If you want one though you’re going to have to hurry, stomach in, chest out, to the nearest Land Rover dealership, as there were only 700 made worldwide, of which South Africa is destined to receive but a handful.

Tags: autobiography black 40th edition, c63 amg, land rover, landrover, motoring, range rover, range rover 40th edition

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