You know, what really pisses me off? Well…many things, I’m slightly temperamental. But in trenches of the legal benches, bureaucracy and civil servants on their little power trips absolutely kills me. It’s kind of like small man syndrome only this gnome keeps the keys to people’s lives.

I had popped into the Family Advocate’s office to check up on an appointment for mediation between an unmarried couple who have been unable to come to an agreement regarding their daughter. The Family Advocate is an office where many family advocates are entrusted with ensuring that the best interest of the child as the first consideration in determining parental rights and responsibilities surrounding the child. As with many thing legal – this is the theory at least. There are a few who hold this office for whom I have immense respect. Others not so.

The particular one that had my blood boiling was allowing the mother to abuse the process: the mother had informed the family advocate that she needed to consult with her lawyer before she could attend a mediation session – a session where no lawyer is allowed to be present and no-one but the parents are at liberty to make submissions regarding their children. No such ‘right’ exists so that the family advocate is not obliged to indulge this request. Nevertheless, the family advocate had agreed and at the time of the visit, more than a month had passed with no appointment having been made and the father was denied access to his child by the mother. Even after explaining the situation to the family advocate she insisted that the mother could speak to the lawyer first which resulted in a shouting match, me insisting on a deadline or limit, up to what point would she allow this abuse process? Another week, another month? Would she let the mother deny the parental relationship between father and daughter which is a Constitutional right? It went back and forth for a bit – she didn’t budge and neither would I. I finally left in a huff, spitting with frustration as she had no right to allow what was happening.

Obviously one could apply to court for access but it is no closely guarded secret that a small minority of our country have the financial means to launch such an application. Apparently I did get my point across as an appointment was set-up within a week of my visit but it doesn’t diminish the sin of prejudicing fathers.

Sometimes I wished baseball bats are an acceptable remedy. But it’s not. The only advice that I can give fathers is that it’s an open office – walk in and demand that your rights are enforced as well.